How to Nicely Tell the Gentleman No July 28, 2024 – Posted in: Relationship Dating Advice – Tags: , ,

I realize we are now in the digital age of communication. I’ve given you a rundown of some of
the dating sites that are out there. This involves digital communication. My personal philosophy
is to never do to a gentleman what I would not want done to me.
Example, There’s ghosting. That means someone is texting/emailing/messaging you and you
don’t like him so you just don’t respond. That’s OK if you have only exchanged comments once
or twice. If it’s more than that I feel the person needs to know that you’re not that into him.
There are a couple words I caution you about. I never put “but” or “you” in a negative
conversation.
Bad example: I thought you were nice, but I don’t go out with men who won’t pick up the bill.
If you ever see the gentleman out in public, it could be very awkward. He just might tell his
friends you’re just a money hungry bitch which is not at all true. You just wanted good manners.

Better example: You are a nice guy and I enjoyed talking with you. I just didn’t feel our goals
for this dating were the same. I wish you good look in your quest to find your soulmate.
That’s a little sappy but you get the point. If you see him out in public again, it will not feel
awkward.

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Bad example: I don’t want to go out with you again because you kept looking at your phone
through the whole date.
That’s a little confrontational and not good if you see him out in public.
Better example: Thank you for the coffee and getting to know you a little better. I think I need
to have more dating experience since I just started this process. I wish you luck with yours.
You turned him down for a second date without bruising the ego. He may be just as nervous as
you are.

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Face to face “ask out” when you really don’t want to go out again after this date.
Bad example: No thank you. You’re not at all what you portrayed on the dating site.

Better example: Thank you for asking. I think you’re very nice. I just don’t really feel the
spark I wanted to feel. I do wish you luck though in this crazy dating scene.
You were able to turn him down without anything negative. It might not be what you are
thinking in your head, but it would be socially appropriate.
Obviously, you need to take the examples and put your own twist on it so it’s what makes you
comfortable to say it.